I Guess It's Working...

After a month's hiatus, I am back on a weight loss track. Whew! I have started a (somewhat) new nutrition plan, and a very new exercise routine. My new weight lifting regimen has kicked my ass.

I have been doing mostly compound movements for the past 6 months or so, but this new routine does compound movement and isolation exercises, split up over 3 days. Yesterday was leg day, and I did squats, split squats, leg extensions, leg curls, calf raises, step ups, reverse lunges, and decline crunches. And today, I feel like an old woman cuz I can barely walk. The routine mixes low sets/reps heavy weight with lighter weight and higher reps, and it is no joke. I couldn't get out of bed this morning to go for my run.

I'm sure it will get better, and I do like the feeling of accomplishment that accompanies soreness, so I won't complain too much. Hopefully the soreness will ultimately be followed by results. Let's see how it goes!

I Remember When...

I dreaded restricting my eating... now I look forward to it.

The idea of following a plan for 16 weeks was daunting... now I am about to start a training program for a half-marathon.

I couldn't run 1 mile straight. Now I can say I ran 6.2!

I thought that staying home on a weekend night was lame. Now I look forward to being able to stay home and relax.

I drank an orange soda every day. Now I eliminate it from my diet and don't even miss it!

I thought that losing weight was something that other people could do, but it wouldn't work for me. Now I have lost 48 lbs.

I thought that my life wouldn't make a difference. Now I'm sure it will.

I valued quantity over quality. Now I know that when it comes to love & friendship, quality is way more important.

Are We Having Fun Yet?

It was fun at first, eating what I wanted to, within reason. I made a conscious decision to take a break from my diet, fully aware that I would gain some weight. I accepted that and decided that it was worth it to be able to have dietary flexibility over the holidays. I have put on some weight, but I also got to see some people that I didn't really get to see during the semester. Worth it, because I have no doubt that I will buckle down & take it off as quickly as possible.

But the funny thing is, I stopped having fun. Eating what I want lost its luster about a week or so ago. Don't get me wrong, I didn't wolf down a whole pizza & 2 liter soda or anything, but I indulged. I thought I would enjoy it so much I would be sad for it to end, but I'm not. I am looking forward to restarting my diet. Which is crazy, because I remember 2 years ago I was completely unwilling to give up my orange soda & dessert to lose weight. My how things have changed. Which is a good feeling, even while I'm eating some cheez its or something, to know that I'm in total control.

So I get back into weight loss on Tuesday. I found a half-marathon to run on May 25 that supports programs for at-risk kids in Boston, which is a cause I believe in. So I'm excited. I start training for that the week of February 10. I realized that long-term goals like that really help me and give me something to work toward. One of the funny things about losing weight is that you can set a numerical goal, but you really have no idea whether that number is going to produce the look you want until you get there. I'm figuring that the amount of running I'll be doing from February 10 - March 29 will help me achieve my goal. And if I get to my number without having the look, I'll have 8 more weeks to get it. Sounds like a plan.

5 Pounds

You would think that while I'm out of class I would be a model blogger, but not so much. Lack of home internet access is certainly a major contributing factor.

I have been enjoying my break from Get Shredded and regimented eating. I planned to take a 2 week break, but was worried about how much weight I would have to re-lose. Thankfully, it seems that in spite of my indulgences my weight is holding steady at 5 lbs up, which is ok with me. I will re-start GS on January 22, and probably do 3 more 14-day cycles. I'm hoping that will leave me at my goal weight, but we'll see. Definitely want to be at 140 by March 29 - my 30th birthday. Once I restart, it's on & poppin until I hit my goal, then I will do get unshredded to incorporate carbs slowly back in without gaining weight, and then I will probably start really focusing on getting the definition in my arms & other places. That's gonna be fun. :)

I have been running again, which is great. I did not lose much, if any, of my cardio capacity when I took a month or so off. That makes me happy.

Although I have been enjoying the freedom of eating pretty much what I want, it's not like it was. I no longer eat something just because it's there. I can have what I want, but it doesn't have me, and that's a big difference for which I am extremely grateful. I hate the feeling of being out of control. Losing weight has definitely taught me that I have the ability to delay gratification on an ongoing basis. That is a powerful lesson that has benefitted me in other areas of my life.

The New Gym Crowd

Ok, I know it's January. How do I know? Because the gym is packed with people who are determined that they are going to get in shape this year. You can tell who the newbies are by the way they walk around inspecting the machines to see what muscles they work. Or the way they wander around the weight room trying to figure out what to do with themselves. They get on the treadmill and painstakingly choose a program and speed. They look at the people around them (and there are plenty) to see what they are doing. This is why I am a morning gym girl - there is far less competition and crowding at 6:30 in the morning. Unfortunately I had to go to the gym at 4:30 pm one day this week, and there were too many people for me. One guy stalked me on the bike. As soon as I got off, he was, literally, next to me, ready to take over. He must have been watching me for cues. And then he stared at me until I left. Of course, I stared back until he gave me a little weak-ass smile. Whateva man. Next day - 6:30 am - ghost town. Just the old faithfuls who have been there all along. Some of the newbies will be there in 6 months and beyond. Some will go until February and fall off until next December. But they'll be back next year. Don't get me wrong - I am not looking down or judging them. We all start somewhere. I started lifting weights to give myself something to do to heal from a break up almost 10 years ago, and I stuck with it and will continue to do so. The question is not where you start, the question is where you are going. I hope that all the new year's resolution gym goers create a lifelong habit of exercise & good nutrition, as long as they stay out of my way. ;)

The Next Level

I've noticed a few 'year in review' posts, so I figured I'd throw my own into the mix. Last year was a pretty big year for me. I applied to grad school, which was an emotionally harrowing process. And I actually got in and received a scholarship that covers almost half of my tuition. I busted my ass my first semester to get grades that I am proud of. I got down to a weight I haven't been since college, and wear a size that I have never worn before. I ran my first 10K. The most important thing to me is not necessarily the accomplishments, but what I have learned about myself. I have learned that I am a finisher. Period. I don't make haphazard decisions or undertake endeavors lightly, because when I decide to do something, I give it my all. I learned that I know how to weather ups & downs to get things done. I learned that I persevere through discomfort, pain and change. I have learned that I am a person that I am proud of.

I am looking forward to taking it to the next level in 2008. I want to run a half-marathon, and a faster 10K time. I want to lose the last however many pounds required to have a flat stomach, and chiseled arms & legs. I want to continue to achieve academically & professionally at the highest level possible for me. I want to continue to nurture relationships that are healthy and fulfilling, allowing myself to be sharpened by intimacy. I want to make choices based on what's best, not what's easiest or most comfortable. I want to continue my quest to understand myself, face the things in me that are broken, unresolved and undeveloped so that I can be the best me I can be. Yeah, I have big goals for 2008, but I have no doubt that they are achievable. I have learned that the most important thing is for me to be able to look in the mirror on December 31 and know that I did my absolute best to bring them to pass. That's what really matters.