50%

My weekend is pretty much halfway over. Today wasn't too bad actually. Probably my most non-productive Saturday since school started. It actually felt kinda nice. I got a massage this afternoon, which was great, even though I'm actually a bit sore. But I feel better.

Tomorrow will be my first day at the gym in 2 weeks. I'm looking forward to it, although I have enjoyed the extra couple of hours of sleep I've gotten this week. Once I start this program (hypertrophy), no time off for 8 or so weeks. But that's cool. The program will be interesting. The number of sets/reps changes every workout. I guess it's supposed to build muscle. Hopefully, the combination of exercise and diet will help get me a few steps closer to the defined body that I am striving for.

Someone told me that I need to give 'self-care' the same level of priority that I give working out. Hmmm... I know I don't get enough sleep. Somewhere in the back of my mind is this idea that I can do with less. So I may plan to get 7 to 8 hours of sleep, and then end up getting 6 or so because I know that I will be ok with 6 hours. I certainly don't give sleep the priority I should. I don't relax enough, I'm too hard on myself, and I'm sure the list goes on. Bottom line: I need to take better care of myself.

The Rubber & The Road

I've been doing just fine in my quest to get shredded. I started on Tuesday, and I have dropped 5 lbs since then. Now, to be fully balanced, I started this quest about 7 lbs up from my lowest recent weigh-in as a result of my lax eating lately. So the 5 lbs that I have lost as of this morning is really re-lost weight. But it's dropped pretty fast, which is cool. Anyway, part of the challenge of this diet is that it eliminates my weekly cheating with a refeed every 14 days. I'm sure that I will appreciate the progress that this allows me to make over the next 6 weeks or so. But... I love my weekends! Monday thru Friday is the grind - most of my days are at least 12 hours of nonstop activity, between class, work, and/or homework. So, Friday through Sunday is a nice break. Have a few drinks, go out to eat, let go of the regimented eating. Relax, basically. So, not doing that, beginning with tonight, isn't just a challenge to my willpower, it's a challenge to my routine. It might be good - force me to find other ways to relax besides food & drink. Since I am making efforts to be better at 'self-care', this actually might help me along that journey. But the next few days is where the rubber meets the road. Wish me luck!

Day 1

Today was the first day of 'Get Shredded'. It wasn't so bad actually. Lots of water, lots of fish oil, veggies and protein. Yum. Making the decision to follow this diet, for however long I choose, reminds me of what weight loss is all about. Choices. Sacrifice. Decisions. Do I love my egg nog, orange Sunkist, and cheat days? Yep. But you know what, I want to lose weight. And I haven't lost 45 pounds to give up now. Or even to slack, or take the easy way. I guess I just have a problem with claiming that I want something, but then not being willing to execute the accompanying, necessary action. I want it, so I'm gonna go get it. Maybe I will lost this 15 lbs by December 31, 2007, maybe I won't. But I'm damn sure going to try.

On another, less soapboxy note, I wore a skirt today, my first size 8 in a long time. And you know what? I had room! It didn't fit like it did when I first bought it, and although I'm not close to a size 6 yet, it was nice to have room in an 8. Although my friend did tell me that I look like a 6 the other day. That's why I pay her the big bucks. ;)

I've Been Tagged...

So, Camille tagged me and I have to say seven random/weird things about myself and tag 7 other people. Here goes...

1. I never ate sandwiches for lunch as a kid. My mom packed me a thermos with ravioli and hot dogs and stuff. I think sandwiches on regular, untoasted bread have a nasty texture. Yuck.
2. One of my nicknames is Beck. My Aunt Rish and Pop, two of my favorite people, both of whom are not here anymore, always called me that.
3. When I was in the 10th grade, I lost 30 lbs without even knowing it.
4. I love Al Pacino.
5. I'm a big sucker for a pretty smile.
6. I cried when I took my cat to the vet to get neutered.
7. It took me and my first real boyfriend about 4 years to break up, after a 4 year relationship.

I'm tagging these people: swanky, Kristen, Melissa, Beck, Tea

From Here to Thanksgiving

I spent a lot of time this weekend planning and preparing for my new diet. As some of you know, I usually eat a strict low to no carb, high protein diet during the week, and much more relaxed on the weekends. Lately I have not been as strict (hence, no weight loss), in part to prepare myself for this phase. This diet is a high fat (50%), low carb, high protein diet. It requires a cut in my caloric intake, and a lot of supplements, mainly fish oil. I'm not a fan of fish oil - it hurts my belly. But a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do, right? The real kicker, though, is that I have to eat the same way on the weekends, and I have a re-feed every 14 days. Thanksgiving will be my first re-feed, and then right back on the wagon for another 14 days. If I see decent results, I will follow this through to the end of the year. There was a time when I wouldn't have done something like this, but I guess I've grown.

Uh Oh...

So, I was in the supermarket yesterday, and I happened upon... egg nog! Oh no! I love egg nog. Especially vanilla egg nog by Hood. Yummy. I am going to have to exercise some willpower this season. Did I mention that I love egg nog? Just checking...

This week is a week off weight lifting for me. Cardio only. I am also supposed to start a new diet, which I am hoping to ride into 2008, 15 lbs lighter. We'll see. On the one hand, I'm excited to see how effective it is. On the other hand, it's a little intimidating, because it requires quite a bit of detailed calculation, which just is not my thing. At all. Thankfully I've had help with that. It is going to mean a lot of meal repetition, no flexibility, no eating out, but I really just need to go ahead and suck it up. I have learned that I have the capacity to do what it takes to get it done, and I'm proud of that. But it doesn't mean that I have to like it. But... I will like the results, and that's what matters.

I saw a friend this weekend that I haven't seen in a while. Seeing her, in part because she's so complimentary and encouraging, reminded me of what I've accomplished over the past year. Not only have I lost the 40 lbs that I gained during a hellish time in my life, I've gone beyond that. And it's not over yet.

Of course, there are also other things I've accomplished and am accomplishing, like school, which is really something like a dream come true for me. But anyway, seeing her motivated me in some weird way to go ahead and finish this thing out. Rock it out, bang it out, get it done, whatever you want to call it. I'm proud of what I've done, but I still have 15 lbs to go, and I'm really ready to take it all off.

Nothing Much to Say...

Well... it's been a while. My eating has been less than stellar as of late. I think this happens to me when I have decided in some way to crack down, or start some new diet regimen that's more restrictive than what I'm used to. I say 'well, I'm about to do [fill in the blank with fun diet plan here], so I can afford to relax a little bit'. I've done it a couple of times during this journey. Perhaps had I not, I'd be finished with my 60 lbs instead of gearing up for the last 15 lbs. Oh well... however long it takes me to get rid of it, I don't expect that I will ever, ever, have to take it off again. But at some point, I really have to buckle down if I'm serious about the body that I want to have by my 30th birthday.

On another note, it's almost time for me to increase my weight. That's a good feeling. The same workout that kicked my ass (hard) two weeks ago is still challenging, but not to the same extent.

Funny story: I went to get water jugs with my co-workers. The janitor told one of them, who's extremely thin, that she can't lift it cuz she's too skinny. He looked at me and said 'I know you can do it. You're healthy and strong'. That's what I'm talking about... ;)